So this is what 24 feels like.

Feels like shit. Ok no not really. But the more b-days I have the less they really seem like a cause for celebration. Shit I've had 24 of these, enough already. This is one is like the last one, which was like the one before that. Which in turn was like the one before that. The only highlight was my 20 at Tonic where I got so completely shitfaced I couldn't walk out of the club. Birthdays are an excuse to get all your friends together that you haven't seen for a long time under one roof under the auspice that they're "celebrating" your birthday. Atleast that's what they are for me. 

The word on the street is that peoples talking to other peoples about making a certain person relive their 20th birthday next Friday. Yes it's true. If you want see me throw up (which I'm told is more entertaining than a midget getting chased by a fat man and dog) come out Friday night (Feb 16th). Not sure where we're going but it's a bar. I know we'll start after work somewhere in the Finance District. Then go for food and end up at a bar. The whole reason why this week is off limits is cause Paul/Kev/John are in Vermont skiing, and Chris is still having the 'shakes' from the flu.

So yes, if you're reading this, please come. Cause I count you as a friend, and if you're technically not a friend I still wanna meet the dozen stalkers that frequent this page with accounts that have no entries in.

Cheers??
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Random Fact #15: The Raptors are the greatest basketball franchise since the '85 Celtics. Seriously

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Guess who has tickets to Nets vs Raptors on Feb 14??? I'll give you a hint, his name starts with J and ends in -eff.

Suckers.

I have sick ass seats behind the net so I can boo and heckle Vince Carter to my heart's delight. I can pretty much stand up and spit at him. And I do realise that it's Valentine's Day, don't ask.

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I had a 10 year old kid tell to me to Fuck Off on Tuesday.
Seriously.

I was getting off the Go Train on Tuesday at Clarkson, and if any of you know that area you'll know the train station and the parking lot are separate by a bridge that's over a drainage ravine. I assume it's a major one cause there's still water flowing while it's winter but recently it froze over. So I get off work and I see 4 kids there on the frozen ice jumping up and down trying to crack ice. Its definitely not safe when you can see they threw some rocks along the center and cracked through the ice, I could see water running underneath the ice.

The problem is all the other 'adults' going across the bridge are looking at the kids but no one is actually saying anything. So good ole Jeff steps up to the plate and yells at them, conversation is as follows:

Jeff: Yo kids! Get off the ice, it's dangerous. You can fall through and get hypothermia (as if fucking 10 year old douchebag kids living in Clarkson knows what hypothermia is)

10 year old douchebag kid #1: Don't worry about it, the ice is thick, we won't fall through (all kids start jumping up and down to demonstrate the thickness of the ice)

Jeff: Still, it's ice. It can break at any time and if that happens you'll freeze in the water.

10 year old douchebag kid #2: It's ok we've been here all day, we won't fall through.

Jeff: Listen, either you can leave now or the security is going to come and kick you off. You kids can pick.

10 year old douchebag kid #1: Why don't you fuck off!

The hell you say?! Oh no you didant! (snaps fingers in menacing black hoochie manner). Fucking 10 year old told me to Fuck Off?! A TEN YEAR OLD!!! My Team Manager says that, ok. My family, ok. Some girl at the bar, ok. The government, ok. BUT NOT A 10 YEAR OLD KID. I was contemplating throwing something really really heavy from the bridge onto the ice just to prove a fucking point. I huffed over to the Go Station's ticket office and told the guy behind the ticket counter that there were kids playing on the ice, and he's like "Not those kids again".
So that's my story. 10 year old white kids from Clarkson deserve no mercy. If I'm ever in that ghetto slum for a neighborhood I'm just going to indiscriminately kick and punch every 10 year old white trash looking kid I see. Cause I've been tainted by this experience, a part of my soul died when that kid told me off.

It's a great track, listen to it

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I am sorry for my absence. I had more pressing matters to attend to for the last 3 weeks. Westpoint Mall needed my help in clearing out the zombie problem, I was the busy training for my light heavy weight boxing title defence and the alliance need my gun to fight the Locust threat. Yes. I am a loser. I have more Xbox games right now than I can shake a stick at. What's worse is that I've been spending the majority of time not playing but tweaking the fucking thing. I read on the net that there are a shitload of third party programs that let you hook ur computers to your xbox and play videos off the xbox onto ur tv. Potentially that's sick. I could be watching porn on my big screen... but I can't get the fucking thing to work (so it's back to the dinky 17inch crt)

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I hate how everyone is sick right now. For me it started the night of new year's when I yakked up big time (cause you know, it's not a party until Jeff pukes). Since then my throat feels like its on fire everytime I swallow anything. The cough alternates between dry to hacking to phlegm filled. I think I've downed two bottles of buckley's so far but to no avail. If I had two brain cells I'd stop doing stupid shit that keeps me sick, like tonight I went from the gym to my car in shorts after a full workout.... twice. Or how I go out running outside still in shorts. I do it to myself.

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Random Fact #11: I love to run, I'll try my best to run until I see snow on the ground. I'll go run in my thermals if I have to.

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Back in first year I had this habit where if I got a case of the stupids I'd go out and run in order to clear my head. I did a lot in 1b term cause I had fricking calc and inorganic chem in the same term. Problem was it was winter and Waterloo has nasty ass winters. But I still ran (a sign of how stupid I am). There's a point to this story... there was this girl that I thought we cute, Mai, I met her in chemistry. I was running one day in the winter and it was crazy cold, not cause it was ambient temperature cold, but windy cold. So after a bit my quads started to cramp up and the pain was unbelievable. I stopped running and I had to stretch that out, so as I was doing stretching exercises (mind you I'm wearing shorts and a hoody in -10 weather) I look up and I see Mai waving at me from her kitchen window. I wanted to crawl in a hole and die right then. She opened the door and smiled  and asked if i wanted some water. I told the whole story to Yatman and Aaron later that night and both of them got up from the dinner table and did stretching exercises to mock me. To this day those two fuckers still do that everytime I see them.
Dickheads.

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Random Fact #12: Chinese people love North Face.

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Random Fact #13: "If it has four legs and it's back is to the sky, it's edible" - Chinese Proverb

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During Boxing day we had this half price sale on North Face jackets at Sportchek. I've never seen chinese people line up like that for clothing. It was insane. It was like Buy 1 Get 1 Free day for bags of rice at No Frills. My parents bought this turtle from the supermarket a couple of days ago. It's like some sorta soft shelled snapper like turtle. I have no clue what species it is, but my dad had that thing in my sink for half a day before he butchered it. He took that thing to the back yard and hacked it up to make some sorta casserole or soup for a party. We're savages man, seriously if any of my neighbors saw my backyard they would see two things. A bald china man wield a cleaver the size of my forearm and a pool of blood. You put two and two together, I'm surprised no cops came to our house.

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I seriously wish people would stop tucking their pants into their boots. It's not cool. No one wants to see ur ugly ass boots. I don't care what ur justification is, it's just low brow when u tuck pants into boots. It's female equivalent of tucking your dress shirt into your boxers (ahem Chris). It annoys me when I see pants tucked into boots, esp Uggs. Cause you know they look like loaves of bread. When my ex bought a pair of them I made of her relentlessly. I would not let her wear them when she went out with me cause I thought it looked so much like she was sticking her feet into loaves of bread. But now people are tucking their pants into those boots and it just looks even nastier. And you know what else I hate? Slow walkers. But not all slow walkers, I hate the ones that block off the entire hallway. You can walk slow, just don't walk slow in the center. Or in groups. I hate that the most, when u get a group of people that walk super slow and line up so that they take up the entire hall way. So I guess you could say that the ultimate pet peeve are slow walkers who take up the entire hall way with their pants tucked into their boots. Holy shit if I ever saw that I'd flip a lid and bust out some drop kicks.

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Random Fact #14: I'm bringing 'Flip Mode' back courtesy of Busta.